I knew keeping up with a monthly newsletter, a blog, and all the personal correspondence with my entire circle of glittering friends at the same time would be difficult! I kinda knew this blog would unfortunately not be updated with so much care since most of you who read it are on my support team (bless 🙏🏼) and get the newsletter anyway, so it would be repetitive. But not today!

I know we as ministry workers are supposed to include the good, the bad, and the ugly in our updates, but I’ll be honest, it’s really hard to include anything after the good. But luckily that’s where this blog comes in! Plus, I did get asked when a new post was coming some time ago, so I guess you can say back by popular demand!

Nobody ever asks me a penny for my thoughts (hence why people keep blogs, I guess) but some corona musings?

This year sucked, but you don’t need me to tell you that. And I could share all the layers of exactly how I feel about it, but I’d just end up pissing off some people, having others agree, not really provide anything constructive, and probably get fired, who knows? I also hate confrontation. But there has been a few things in this past year that have been rattling around in my head that halfway shake me out of this dependent on technological entertainment-consumeristic-slow descent into 1984 levels of society-maskacne filled world we unfortunately now live in as this continues to sweep the nation.

One day in mid November, I got in my car, and said to myself fairly placidly, “Ok, that’s it. I think that’s it. I’ve hit my covid limit. No more can happen, cause I simply cannot take anymore.” And for maximum irony, that night was the night my Summit (training with other EDGE’rs) that never got to happen in May didn’t get to happen a second time because it was canceled again. And I shouted, “But I hit my limit!!! I can’t do this anymore!” How do you comfort that? You don’t. These two things are the only things that make me persist through this SUCK we’re living through.

First, the historical event of the Jewish exile to Babylon, which you can find at the end of Jeremiah. Why did they get sacked, pillaged, carted off into slavery, and have their capital city destroyed, you may ask? Well, the answer is not so touchy feely. The nation of Israel had participated and installed into their lives SO MUCH SIN. From the time Moses went to get the Ten Commandments to up until the fall of their city. There was no excuse, pause, or limit to their depravity, quite unfortunely. And although in all the promises of the Old Testament that say that God will provide a way back and restore them, this had to come first. Because of how they had chosen to live their lives. And boy does it feel that way as a christian in America in the 21st century.

I’m no theological scholar, but I feel like I can now make the parallels between what happened then and what is happening now. This pandemic is really unfair. It is unfair systematically and it has felt very personal as well. Why would a loving God do this to earth? Well, why did he send the Babylonians to destroy his holy people? For the punishment of their sin against him (idolatry), and in the hope that this would be enough to make those people turn back to their one true God. Unpopular opinion nowadays in our ‘positive vibes only at church’ society-there are consequences for sin. The good news is there is now no punishment for those who repent of that sin and turn to Jesus (see Romans 8:1). But just because now there is no eternal punishment doesn’t mean we don’t have earthly consequences for our choices. God don’t roll like that. And we as a nation have sinned. It would be so naive in my prayers to God to think that this is unfair. The sin of our nation is so obvious-we have turned away from God to:

• idolatry (see the lines out the Apple store and how much the average American spends in front of a screen).
• gratuitous sexual sin and violence (why are strip clubs here in Florida open free reign for business, but you still have to get a ticket to church? I wasn’t aware the sex industry was essential).
• our own personal comfort and convenience and selfishness (which in the extreme leads to tragedies such as neglect and abortion).

Just to name a few. So my prayers have not been, “God this is undeserved and doesn’t line up with your character.” They have been repeatedly, “Lord, I know this country has sinned. And its sin is bad and we are so far from you. Will you please take your hand off this nation and relent?” The Israelites had to pray that prayer for 70 years before they were delivered from their afflictions and sent home. So when I look at this comparison for comfort, I do not think idealistically that once we have a vaccine everything will be fine again. No, I’m hunkering down for this marathon God might be bringing us through, and this has only been year one. Imagine how the next 69 will be.

So point number one is really more the logical comfort about how this kind of thing has happened before and there’s nothing new. But secondly is more the emotional comfort. Here’s a fun fact about me- I love OLD country hymns. The more grainy and crackly the recording, the better. Old american songs from like the 1880’s, fiddle music, etc. Like, we will be doing the Virginia Reel at my wedding. I’ve been stumbling onto some really obscure hymns (cause ones like Come Thou Fount and It is Well are so overdone now, right?) and I came across one version done by Randy Travis of “Will The Circle Be Unbroken?” The song itself is kind of depressing, being about a mother dying, but the chorus is what I liked:

“Will the circle be unbroken?
By and by, Lord, by and by
There’s a better home a-waiting
In the sky, Lord, in the sky.”

So simple, but so profound. And this chorus from “Ye Elders of Israel”:

“O Babylon, O Babylon, we bid thee farewell;
We’re going to the mountains of Ephraim to dwell.”

These are the promises that I’m clinging to in this season. Not that everything will be better next year. I’m sorry, I’m just too much of a cynic to believe everything in America from racial unrest to this sickness will ever be resolved and we’ll all hold hands and love each other again. I do believe there is such a thing as the point of no return. And we’re there. What I am clinging to is that soon, so soon, I’ll be able to delight in the promises that I’ve suffered here on earth for. That promise of Heaven, and that it is the home waiting for me is, most days, the only thing that gets me out of bed in this exhausting world right now. What else could? One day, I will get to march out of Babylon and sing and cry out, “Farewell!” and head away from the land of my sin. And be jubilant that the circle has been unbroken and that I get to go to that land far away in the sky.

~J

“Then I saw ‘a new heaven and a new earth,’ for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.’ He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!’”- Revelation 21:1-5