So disregard everything I said at the end of the last post, because life decided to be cancelled for an indefinite period of time now. Is this going to be a blog about the current events right now? Absolutely not. Things have just changed for me so rapidly I probably should give some updates.

So my last semester of college basically got cancelled. Everything from senior week to capstone presentations to the research symposium I was going to present at and almost surely, graduation. Everything Navs related got cancelled (or “rescheduled” if you’re being optimistic) like women’s weekend, our talent show, weekly meetings, and senior night.

I’m taking it super well, as you can imagine, all those things along with being a raging extrovert. It’s fine.

It’s fine.

It’s fine.

It’s fine,

Everything is fine.

Why should I be allowed to feel disappointment? Every time I’ve mentioned being frustrated to anyone, the only response I’ve gotten back is a very veiled or ill intended “buck up”. Unexpectedly, the only (and I think I unfortunately do mean only) person who immediately met me with sympathy first was Kristin Ciampa. So forget feeling those feels.

And I know it is wrong to hold on to earthly things, so I’m just trying to not cry at the thought of not getting to ceremonially graduate with my lovely environmental science friends. God is allowed to do whatever he wants, so I shouldn’t feel sad about missing all of those things and should shut up and watch TV like everybody else is.

Right?? I’m just not sure.

Anyway, rant over. Please don’t ask me how I really feel because I might just light into it and it will be an hour before I let you off the phone. The way I really feel is almost never allowed to come out because it is so un-christian and I should be better than that.

In all the craziness, one roommate moved home and another is stuck in North Caroline from athletics competition, and I was asked to move out of my apartment. Yikes. So desperately I applied to stay on campus (was not ready to move home to Florida for 2+ months) and did get accepted, but when the call came that I was to move to a single room in Philippi, I knew I couldn’t do it. Not only are they the exact dimensions of a prison cell (probably), I would have to buy a meal plan or eat microwavable food for like, a month. Double yikes, and was not willing to do that. So after all the initial angry prayers, desperate prayers, and details, the Doyon family let me move into their extra room/semi apartment-ish immediately and for the summer.

Woah!

I cannot tell you how good my back feels after just one night of not being on a dorm mattress. Their place always smells like cookies and is immaculately clean, and I just finished moving and getting everything I needed today. It’s like a breath of fresh air, living here. The Doyons are being so incredibly generous, and I do think I can call them my very first supporters for all that they’ve done.

This past year in the dorms physically was rough. It’s been pretty jarring living here after coming home (and I promise you, none of this is exaggerated at all) to goat bones on the floor, loud music until all hours of the morning, and awful cooking smells not even a whole can of febreeze and four lighted candles could cut through. It was incredibly embarrassing when company would come over and see the state of the room no matter how many times I would clean, it would go right back to what it was. Again, I never wanted to complain, because that is un-christian, and didn’t really admit to myself that it was getting to me. I should be content with wherever I am, even if that place smells and makes me want to puke 60% of the time. But here, I actually feel like I can come out of my room and be in the space. I know that sounds silly, but it’s true.

The move is really the only thing worth updating. So far, I’m reading a lot, doing a puzzle, and waiting for the day I can go out in public again. I hope it’s soon. Hopefully we can expect a post about my EDGE placement for the next two years. Still waiting on Benny C.

~J